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It's me meli

Welcome friends. So happy you made it.

I AM 1 IN 4

I AM 1 IN 4

“When are you going to have a baby?”. Seems like such a sweet and simple question.  “When our house is finished.” “When it happens it happens.”  “We’re enjoying married life.” None of these answers were true.  The truth was, this question broke my heart every time I was asked.

When I first found out I was pregnant it was late March 2016.  Married for two months, pregnant with our first baby, life was so good!  Until it wasn’t.  At 7 weeks I had my first miscarriage.  It was hard, but I kept it to myself, put a smile on my face, and tried to move forward.

July 2016, I was pregnant again.  I figured there was no way I would miscarry a second time, but I was wrong.  At 13 weeks we went to the hospital on a Sunday morning.  I was bleeding and cramping, but the baby still had a heartbeat.  We left that afternoon hopeful that it was nothing.  The cramps got worse, and started coming every 3-5 minutes.  The next day I went to see the Dr. again.  I was vomiting, and could barely stand up straight because the pain was so bad.  The Dr. sent me straight to the hospital.  While I was laying in the hospital bed, my water broke.  At that point, I didn’t care what was happening I just wanted the pain to stop!  They did another ultrasound and there was no longer a heartbeat.  They sent me home that afternoon, and I had my second miscarriage.

Each time I miscarried, I read hundreds of stories of other women’s experiences.  No two stories were the same, even my own two stories are different.  My first miscarriage felt like the worst period cramps I’ve ever had, and my second miscarriage felt like labor.  Regardless of how I physically felt, they were both emotionally painful.

I never imagined that getting pregnant would be so heartbreaking , but I would go through it all a million times if in the end it gave me my baby girl.  Most people don’t know that my daughter was actually my 3rd pregnancy.  It was too hard to talk about.  I didn’t want anyone feeling bad for me, or thinking there was something wrong with me.  When I finally started talking, I realized I wasn’t alone.  1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage. Talking helps.  Talk to a friend who’s gone through it, join a forum and share your story, or talk to me!  Miscarriage awareness is so important.  If you’re 1 in 4, know that you’re not alone, and don’t give up hope!

💙💕

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Meli

17 thoughts on “I AM 1 IN 4

  1. You are so strong. Your story is an inspiration to all that’s going through hard times. I can only imagine how difficult it was for you guys and now with Charlie’s situation, you have it hard again. You guys are my favorite instagram family. You’re daughter is beautiful and Charlie is an amazing pup. Stay strong!

  2. Meli
    You are such a strong woman. I’m so proud of you. To share these life situations will help others in similar situations more than you know. Keep up the great work. I love you

  3. I understand your story completely , I have had 4 and an ectopic. And no one understands your pain unless they’ve been through themselves. They can be understanding and supportive but it’s just not the same

    I am so happy that little Gentle came into this world. Enjoy every minute.

    Jen

  4. Wow. Things you never knew! I’m sorry this happened to you. How brave of you to speak out about your own painful stories to lessen that of others. You’re a kind soul, Melissa! Hugs.

    1. Thank you! I don’t feel like everyone needs to share their story, but I do think it’s so important for people to know how common it is!

  5. I hear you girl . I never did miscarry but I did try and try and try with no success . Also heartbreaking . Each failed cycle. Feeling like a failure and losing hope every month . It really put a tole on my marriage and my social life . To put the icing on the cake I had two failed IUIs . That’s when I really lost my mind . But , I never gave up . I knew I was going to have to do IVF for unexplained infertility at the young age of 26. I agree with you. All the pain and tears , I would still do it again if It meant my baby girl would be here with me now 😌 .

  6. I too am 1 in 4. I had two miscarriages when I was younger. I have two wonderful children now who are 25 and 29. I wish I had someone to talk to when it happened to me. I’m so thankful for people like you who are speaking out and talking about this topic. I never really grieved the lost that I truly experienced. Please keep letting people knythaybits ok yo talk about.

  7. I am also “1 in 4”. You’re going to give a lot of hope to someone out there Melli. Can’t wait to follow your blog.

  8. You’re amazing… just like you to turn your pain and sorrow into hope and light for others!! You’re an inspiration and your heart speaks volumes! Love you Melisa

  9. I’m so sorry that you went through this silently. I can only imagine the emotional pain you felt. I love that you’re reaching out to help others. ❤️

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